ratapan??

mlm ni lagi" prsaan gw galau, entah knp tp da 2 co yg bqn gw kpqrn trs.
mntn gw...
*a***...

gw udh lm ptus sm mntn, dr dsmbr taun llu. mslhnya gw udh cp trs d boongin n d slingkuhin, n mgkn jg dy udh cp sm gw yg lum dwsa dlm mnykapi mslh n sllu mrh gr" hal spele. dy sllu blg gw hrs bs lbh dwsa, pdhl dy jg g dwsa, lum bs ckup sbr bwt ngajarin gw. gw akuin mpe dtik ni gw nulis ni post, gw masi syg sm dy...tp gw tw bgd dy g akn pnh balik bwt gw, n ttg qt cm da d ms lalu. masi ja da aer mta yg kluar tiap x gw kpqrn dy, pdhl gw udh sllu blg ma dri gw, stop crying; he even doesnt think about me!!! tiap x nangis, gw sllu yqn kl gw bs kuat brdri d atas kq gw ndri, n it works. gw kliatan ce tangguh,cria, humoris n tnp bban, pdhl mrka g tw yg da dlm prsn,jiwa n ht trdlm gw, rapuh, goyah, sllu da aer mta yg trssa. gw udh pnh cb jlnin hbgn sm cowo" laen, tp lum da yg pas n bqn gw jth ht. gw bgo. masi ja ngarepin hal yg g mgkn, n prsn gw udh tllu sqt bwt jth cnta lg. mgkn ni jg yg nybabin byk co yg gw tolak n tiap da yg dktin, gw lgsg ngjauh bwt nghndarin mrka. tiap x gw doa, gw mnt smua yg trbae utk dy n gw, gw mw dy bhgia dsna, biarpn dy g bs lg gw sntuh. andai dy bs gw pluk lg, gw bkl blg kl gw mavin dy n gw rela nglpas dy asl dpt smw kbhgiaan, tp tu smw cm mmpi, khayalan bodoh banget yg g bkl mgkn jd knytaan. bbrpa mggu yg llu gw mmpiin dy lg stlh skian lm, dlm mmpi gw bnr" dy ngasi slm prpsahan bwt gw d sat qt lg brsng"...gw g mgkn bs jd ky yg dy pengenin. one last word if he could know: kodok, mavin smw ktdakdwsaan ndut, moga dsna bhgia n skss bwt krirnya.....

biarpn gw byk dkt sm co n bbrpa da yg cb dktin gw bwt jd my special one, tp gw sk sm 1 co, dy bbrpa taun lbh tua, dy seumrn mntn, let's call him imut. awlna bysa bgd n g da prsn papa k dy, krn rs pnsrn gw pgn liat orgna ky gmn, eehhhh,,, gw mlh jd sk ma tu co... gw mnk jarang bgd bs ngliat imut, tp tiap x ktm pst prsn gw lgsg deg"an n kpqrn trs mpe lp wkt!!! prsn gw mlai bs smgt n bgkit sjk gw sk ma dy, lum pnh da co stlh gw pts yg bs bqn gw kesengsem slaen dy. udh gt, byk bgd kjdian anh bin lcu tiap x qt papasan, da jaaaaaaaa kjdian anh, ky wkt gw lyt, dy lgsg lari buru" n sat tu gw jg lg sm tmn gw yg co... gw cm bs trs doa biar dy bs jd imam bwt gw sllu, g cm sat ni ja. n mdh"an dy yg trakhr. amiin...

prsn gw jd sdqt lega stlh nuang tulisan d atas.
ya Rabb...
tnjukan jlnMu agr hamba tak mrsa sprti ni lg...